Due to my drinking my role as a parent became void.
Many of us have heard the story of the prodigal son. Leaving home with all his inheritance only to blow it all and ending living in a literal pig sty. He crawled back home just hoping to take on a role of a servant. His father, however, welcomed him with open arms and restored him to a place of prosperity right beside him. But what about those prodigal parents? Those parents who, in varying degrees, leave home at the invite of alcoholism and addiction.
I would do things that I swore I would never do.
I was one of those parents. Being a father was important to me and in some aspects I was a great one. But as the years passed, alcohol began to become more of a priority in all that I decided to do. I began to slowly miss the sights, sounds, and smells of raising my children. The intimate moments that a father gets to set his children in the ways that they should go. Alcohol would be the root cause of me hearing the cries of my children. “Try harder, Daddy!” and “Daddy, please don’t go!” fell on ears that had gone deaf due to my drinking.
My children were everything to me. There was nothing more important to me than to see them happy and safe. That alone reminds me of just how powerful addiction and alcoholism is. I could and would forsake my kids for a drink. The thoughts of those days disgust me, but, they have also moved me to find my purpose. Through the fight I have with alcoholism I have been able to see the promise of God on my life. My faith in the fact that He turns to good what the enemy means for bad is evident. Whether you are the prodigal son, or even a prodigal parent, you can always go home.
From the moment I hit my knees and asked for help I have been led to a purposeful call on my life. My recovery has brought healing and connection with my children. I have been able to reunite with my youngest. You can read more on that in Faith Full Father. Consequently, I have been able to finally be a father while beginning to establish a connection with my oldest. You can read my oldest’s story in Breaking Chains. My two middle children, my boys, have always been there but my alcoholism took from them severely also. Removing booze from my life has allowed my sons and I a fresh start which I wrote about in Beer Goggles. Then it hit me, there is one thing in my recovery that resonates throughout my story and that is the transforming and renewing of the relationships with my children.
This weekend I had the opportunity to talk with Daniel Maurer of Transformation is Real. During our conversation he brought up this same point of reconnecting with my children. I had been praying for guidance, for people and opportunity to cross my path, that would be wisdom in the steps I take forward. My recovery has been based solely on my faith. When I said, “Jesus, Help Me!”, I passed the test. His grace was sufficient for me no matter what I had done or where I had been. It is something I could never earn nor would I ever deserve. It was also my example in becoming the father that my children need today.
Alcoholism brought me to my greatest purpose, being a parent.
In putting down the bottle I have finally been able to realize the great responsibility and reward of being a parent. A parent that could lead his children in the way that they should go. Through my battle with alcoholism, my weakness was made perfect in His strength. I am bringing a new platform to Warriors On Purpose. It is the triumph in my story. Embracing the prodigal parent that I am and sharing how through recovery the relationships with my children, my greatest joys, have been given new life. How finding my “WHY” has changed my life. As life continues to unfold I will continue to share the message of hope that YOU CAN ALWAYS GO HOME!
We recover a life with our kids that we never imagined possible.
Addiction can do horrible things to parents, their kids, and their families. I am living proof that we can and do recover. In recovery, parents can find renewed and transformed relationships with their children. In my platform, Prodigal Parent, I will be giving parents who have experienced this miracle of rebirth with their kids an opportunity to tell their story. We must let people know that there is hope no matter how dark the storm may seem. Please contact me, click here to email, and let’s talk about how you can share your story, your miracle, the stories of how prodigal parents made it back home.